What is involved in an open adoption agreement?
What does it involve and how "open" are things. Also, how binding are they?
Well Moose, I hope I never get as cynical as you are about these things.
Hi Randy,
Thank you for bringing this up. I often see misinformation posted in this section regarding what open adoption includes.
Open adoption has nothing to do with the adoptee having any legal rights to adoption and birth records upon adulthood. That is decided ONLY by the state laws regardless of what arrangements were made at the time of relinquishment or finalization of the adoption. Currently there are only 6 U.S. states that have equal rights for adult adoptees, and that is true whether or not adoptions are considered open or closed.
This means even if a person is involved in what was decided to be an open adoption, regardless of whether or not it is later honored, the adoptee is still treated as a closed adoption adoptee when it comes to rights under the law. If an Open Adoption adult adoptee requests their adoption records/original birth certificates, even with all 4 of their consenting parents present, the answer will still be the same as for closed adoption adoptees: "NO. The records are still permanently sealed by law." Everyone will be directed to get a court order to release records.
Many a mother has relinquished her child under the false premise that the child will later have access to their own records and information if open adoption is chosen. This is simply not the case. There are even AP’s who believe this to be true as well. It is purposely misleading to everyone that full disclosure of these facts is not the norm within the adoption industry. Very few expectant mothers would consider adoption if closed were the only option. Few would agree with open adoption if they knew what it really meant legally. By the time they realize what it really means, it’s usually too late.
Open adoption really refers to the informal agreements that are made between both sets of parents before the Adoption is finalized. They mean nothing legally. They may be honored, they may not be. It can range from simply having an expectant mother do the choosing of the adoptive family, to meeting each other, to pictures & letters, to having extended contact over the years. It could possibly give the adoptee a chance to have some sort of relationship with natural family members as they grow up. Again, none of this has any effect upon the adoptee’s legal rights, which are none when it comes to adoption. There is no legal recourse for the natural mother either if the APs decide to close an open adoption at some point after it’s been finalized. By the way, this is a very common practice.
Open adoption continues to be grossly misrepresented to the public and to the triad. To the APs who do honor the agreements made, thank you! You are doing the right thing. Thanks Randy, for the opportunity to clarify here.
julie j
reunited adoptee
The openness of the adoption is completely up to the biological and adoptive parents. It can mean as little as the child simply knowing the names of their biological parents, to something as involved as regular visits, pictures, updates, gifts, etc.
Everyone is different and you have to do what makes you and everyone involved, comfortable.
As for the post adoptive agreement, while it is a contract, I have never seen anything happen to someone who did not follow it. Ince an adoption is finalized, the adoptive family calls the shots. If they choose that it is not in the best interest of the child or their family for continued contact, they can end it.
As for whether or not you could fight this, you would have to talk to lawyear about that. Overall though, both families just want what is best for the baby, and they grow to be a close network of support for one another
References :
adoptive mom
"Open, or fully disclosed, adoptions allow adoptive parents, and often the adopted child, to interact directly with birth parents." It basically involves the birth parent’s right to communicate with the child while the adoptive parents are still financially responsible. In a traditional closed adoption, however, the birth parent won’t have certain privileges or rights if they ever want to see or communicate with their child, or maybe even reclaim their child.
The communication allowed for birth parents include e-mails, letters, and etc
Here’s a wonderful website explaining to full detail open adoptions:
http://www.childwelfare.gov/pubs/f_openadoptbulletin.cfm
References :
Open adoption agreements are not legally binding in any state.
And as far as what’s involved in them: it consists of a smokescreen to convince vulnerable Mothers to give away their children. Because, you know, it won’t be so bad since they get to have CONTACT with their child that someone else is raising…right? And then, once the ink is dry…what contract?
References :
I have to agree that open adoption is not what it says that it is in print. If you read how open adoption is described on adoption web sites it all sounds nice but when you try to get them to do what they advertise it is a whole different story.
I know that it really all depends on who the nparents and the aparents are. It is not fair to say that all do not abide by open agreements. I have read posts on here where it seems that there are some aparents that have wonderful relationships with their children’s nparents and vice versa.
The main point is that it is up to the aparents whether or not they abide by the open agreement or whether they don’t. They may at times have a really good reason for not abiding by it.
In my experience with open adoption there is an agreement with my grandson’s nmother but the aparents will not allow my son to have an agreement with them for open adoption. The nmother is addicted to meth and my son does not have substance abuse issues. He is a responsible and hard working adult. My grandson was adopted without my son’s knowledge and since my son has located his son he has tried to work with the aparents in a kind and reasonable manner. They are unwilling to budge. So what happened to the way that was described on the website as to how open adoption works…….it went out the window.
References :
Open adoption agreements are not binding in my state. My daughter’s best friend was scammed by a couple who lied through their teeth to get her baby boy. She was promised letters, email, photos, and visits. She got nothing, nada. They moved and changed their phone numbers.
A neighbor basically sold her daughter’s baby to a couple with an agreement for an open adoption. The couple moved to the other side of the country and will not answer mail or phone calls.
So, in my experience open adoption involves lying and treating mothers like dirt. It’s just the adoption industry "prettying up" adoption to get more babies to sell.
And the agreements are not binding at all. The mother may get some crumbs off the table in the way of a few photos for a few years, but from what I read on forums, she will need to walk on eggshells to get even that.
References :
Earned my cynicism the hard way.
Hi Randy,
Thank you for bringing this up. I often see misinformation posted in this section regarding what open adoption includes.
Open adoption has nothing to do with the adoptee having any legal rights to adoption and birth records upon adulthood. That is decided ONLY by the state laws regardless of what arrangements were made at the time of relinquishment or finalization of the adoption. Currently there are only 6 U.S. states that have equal rights for adult adoptees, and that is true whether or not adoptions are considered open or closed.
This means even if a person is involved in what was decided to be an open adoption, regardless of whether or not it is later honored, the adoptee is still treated as a closed adoption adoptee when it comes to rights under the law. If an open adoption adult adoptee requests their adoption records/original birth certificates, even with all 4 of their consenting parents present, the answer will still be the same as for closed adoption adoptees: "NO. The records are still permanently sealed by law." Everyone will be directed to get a court order to release records.
Many a mother has relinquished her child under the false premise that the child will later have access to their own records and information if open adoption is chosen. This is simply not the case. There are even AP’s who believe this to be true as well. It is purposely misleading to everyone that full disclosure of these facts is not the norm within the adoption industry. Very few expectant mothers would consider adoption if closed were the only option. Few would agree with open adoption if they knew what it really meant legally. By the time they realize what it really means, it’s usually too late.
Open adoption really refers to the informal agreements that are made between both sets of parents before the adoption is finalized. They mean nothing legally. They may be honored, they may not be. It can range from simply having an expectant mother do the choosing of the adoptive family, to meeting each other, to pictures & letters, to having extended contact over the years. It could possibly give the adoptee a chance to have some sort of relationship with natural family members as they grow up. Again, none of this has any effect upon the adoptee’s legal rights, which are none when it comes to adoption. There is no legal recourse for the natural mother either if the APs decide to close an open adoption at some point after it’s been finalized. By the way, this is a very common practice.
Open adoption continues to be grossly misrepresented to the public and to the triad. To the APs who do honor the agreements made, thank you! You are doing the right thing. Thanks Randy, for the opportunity to clarify here.
julie j
reunited adoptee
References :