We just spoke with an attorney yesterday about my husband adopting my daughter. BD is ready to sign the termination of parental rights; anything to get out of paying child support. Do we need a home study done? The attorney said yes and that it would cost around $500; add that to his fees (ouch!).

If your child is less than 8 years old and you have been married for less than five years, it appears the answer to your question is "yes". Here’s an excerpt from Indiana law regarding home studies for stepparent Adoptions:

Synopsis: Stepparent adoptions. Provides that a court may determine that a home study is not required before an adoption is granted if: (1) the person who seeks to adopt a child is the child’s stepparent and the child is at least eight years of age; or (2) the person who seeks to adopt the child has been married for at least five years to the child’s parent.

Her mother has been in and out of her life since she was born. My step daughter is now 6 years old and calls me mommy and her real mom by her first name. I have been married to her dad for the past 5 years now and I want to adopt my step daughter.. But what legal rights would that give me over my stepdaughter if any that i dont have now. Dad has full legal physical custody of the child so i am not sure where to go from here? Any advice would be great. Thanks

Well I don’t know your whole situation, but my ex husband was behind on child support, about $2000.00 and I just said, hey if you will sign over parental rights I will forget the child support, I won’t pusue collecting it. Now this can’t be in the paperwork, he had to sign something saying there was no coersion to make him sign it. But he didn’t care, he had been in and out of my children’s lives. So I went to the county attorney ( he was free) they drew me up the paper work for him to sign, and three moths later they were adopted. If you don’t have anything to convince her or if you don’t think she will sign on her own, just go to an attorney, you have to prove her unfit and since your child seems to not care for her, she would be a good person to use in the case, but you have to be careful that it doesn’t affect her. Good luck and contact me if you need to.

I have a 12 year old son my husband and I are going through the process of Step Parent Adoption. Can we get adoption assistance of any kind, during and after the process?

I don’t believe that you qualify for assistance from any government agency as this child is the natural child of your husband. However, I know a lot of attorneys donate pro bono time for Adoption matters, especially in situations where it will be straight forward (like yours). The only way to find out if that is possible is to call an attorney and ask. You can also ask if he can do it on a flat fee, which could save you some money.

It really depends on your state and their rules. Some states require a lot of paperwork and home visits and the like. OThers require very little. I am in the middle of adopting my step-daughter and we had to pay $1500 up front. You can google your state and step parent Adoption and see what kind of information you get. Or call any attorney in your area. Most will give quotes on how much money you are looking at. And most have a free initial consult. GOODLUCK!

Does anyone know about adoption rights in Scotland, bio father has had no contact with child for 4 years and has never made any financial contribution, if a step parent wishes to apply to adopt would the bio father require to be contacted?
The bio father’s name is on the birth certificate. Thanks x

I’m a social worker trained in scotland and worked in England. In England I did quite a few "mothers own" adoptions as they were known. I prepared a report for the lower courts. The report sets out the mothers reason for Adoption and in particular why it would benefit the child. The childs father is always contacted and would have a say. Obviously the courts want to know what the prospective adoptive father thinks because adoption confers complete responsibility financially/emotionally.
One question to ask yourself is if I died would my current partner bring up the child as his own ?
What do other family members think?
The adoption would also remove all rights from the natural father. Does your child wish this now or in the future?
Lots to consider if in any doubt my advice would be to wait for a couple of years and see then.

Best wishes.

I am trying to find books to read to my three-year-old to help her understand that the daddy she has now is not the one that she was born with. Every children’s book I come up with about Adoption is about a child being adopted by both parents. Does anyone know of any good kid’s books about step-parent adoption?

Check with your local library and see what they can find. You might also want to check some of the book stores/websites. Do a search for step-parents or something along that line.

We are submitting our application but my husband (step-dad) needs to write a letter requesting the Adoption and stating that he understands his responsibilities in doing such. We are not sure exactly what we should put in the letter…anyone do this?
Story is simple. We have been together for 7 years, married for 1 and a half. Kids are 8 and 9. They started calling him dad about a year ago on their own. He is the only father they really know as he has been the one taking care of them for the past 7 years. The kids are excited that he will possibly be adopting them.

Yes, I am actually going through the same thing right now. What your husband needs to do is send in a simple letter stating that he has taken care of your your child for so and so yrs. State how long he has taken care of her. Although i am not sure, does your child call him dad, does she want this adoption to go through.
But anyways, if they have a father daughter relationship and I am assuming this is the case. He needs to state I would like to ask the courts or whomever this is going to consider this adoption and explain how long he has been raising the child and that they have developed a father daughter/son relationship. Make it short and simple. Just state the obvious, and ask the courts to consider the adoption becuase he wants it and the child wants it. If I knew more on what was going on I would be able to help, but I don’t really know the story, I hope this helps you some, and good luck to you!!

My husband wants to adopt my son. His bio-father has never wanted anything to do With him but wont sigh off his rights or return my phone calls. I need to know what my first step should be.
Bio dad does pay support, but only for the last year. I lost my job and had to seek state assistance who forced us to go after him for support. he has and wants no other contact.
My son is 7.

does bio dad pay child support, have visitation or send letters/cards to your son? If so, not a lot you can do without bio dad approving.

If bio dad doesn’t have any contact, including child support, you can have him declared abandoned and clear the way for step dad to adopt him.

Get a lawyer in your state to give you the specifics/

I’m a single mommy to my beautiful 3 1/2 m/o baby girl and her biological father voluntarily gave up his rights in court. My boyfriend loves her like his own and although we may one day break up both he and I consider him her father. Can he legally adopt her just as in a a step-parent Adoption w/out any plans of marrying me? I’m 16 but he’s several years older. We live in NS, Canada so the laws here may be different than those in the US- I also know they vary from province to province or state to state. But I’d appreciate a general answer. Thanks!!!

In Texas the simple answer is yes legally However it is unlikely you would find a judge willing to do so

I am about to get married soon, I have twins and their father is in jail in Texas for murder. He has never been in contact with them, I have a order for child support but I have never received any monies from him. He doesn’t write or try to contact the twins. They will be 7 in December. What should my fiancee do to adopt them. Is it expensive for Adoption in Tennessee.

You post and run an add in the paper for thirty days and if the ex does not reply then the fiance can adopt the children. It works in Illinois it should work there. Get a free consultation with an attorney and tell him you have no idea the where abouts of the father and your fiance wants to adopt the twins and then get a free consultation with another attorney and tell him the real story and get some facts about the law in your state then make your decision. Also there is a web site handle on the law they might be able to help. Have a wonderful day.